Welcome to Amsterdam

I picked up this Visitor's Guide to Amsterdam today and I was delighted with the section on the Police rules for the Red Light District (RLD). Here's an excerpt :

Normal Behaviour
Too much alcohol often causes irresponsible and childish behaviour. Undressing in public, jumping in canals etc. etc. Please don't make a fool of yourself.

Screaming and Shouting
Especially in the evenings and during the nights it causes great disturbances to the people who live here and who are sleeping and have to get up early. Sing along in pubs, have fun, but be quiet on the streets. Remember the fine that can await you.

Urinating in Public
Dirty habit, always committed by men. Don't ruin our houses and monuments. You can either go in one of the bars and tip the bartender for using the toilet or use one of the public toilets. You also can go to a police station.

Prostitution
If you visit one of the women, we would like to remind you, they are not always women. Outside on the streets, don't shout or use bad language toward these women. Show some respect. In case you have a problem with a girl or a pimp, don't hesitate to ask a police man/woman, we know why you're here and you can hardly surprise us anymore.